It’s said that women of today, at least in the western world, has all possibilities at hand. Well, it might be right, but no matter how we twist and bend it, the way women do it is still never just right.
A woman gesticulating and shouting while giving a public speech, will most likely be branded aggressive. A man on the other hand, will be conceived as vigorous and dynamic.
A woman who plays her cards well, and who manages the feat of climbing to the top in her domain, easily risks being labelled cunning, cold and calculating. Her male counterpart will most likely be called clever, or be spoken of as a man with ambitions.
A woman who chose a professional career will be blamed for putting herself before the wellbeing of the family. Also implying she is a “bad” mother, who rather leaves her children to other people rather than caring for them herself. Or simply, she’s egoistic as she prefers a career rather than happy family life at home. I don’t think I have ever heard a man accused of the same, even if he’s hardly present at dinner table as he is working all the time.
A woman who chose to be home (at least for a longer period than the normal maternity leave), is accused by many to idolize the ideal of a housewife from the 1950’s. Feminists fought for the rights of women to work at the same terms as men, and choosing differently makes you a “traitor”. A man choosing to be taking care of the house and the children might be perceived as a bit weird, maybe even a bit weak. If so, this is the only circumstance I can think of that men really might face negative critics for their choice.
A women who shaves her legs and armpits, and puts make up is a victim of the cruel beauty tyranny which is pushed upon us from all sides.
A woman who does not shave her legs and armpits, are on the other hand said to be “disgusting”.
Men can more or less do as they like. Beard or no beard, it’s more about taste and fashion than about what’s acceptable.
This is just some examples that came to my mind. The point is of course, that no matter what women do, there are always someone at hand to give critics about our choices or our manners.
Even in 2016, the same characteristics and manners of women and men, most often give negative points for the woman, and plus points for the man (see the first three paragraphs above).
It actually amazes me that we are we still there. I would have believed that in 2016, we were no longer so obsessed with gender in this way.
What makes me most upset, is that no matter what women chose, it’s never really “right”. We are too much or too little no matter what. I do wonder, if the time will ever come, when we as well will be allowed to be just human beings. Individuals who lives our lives the way that suits us best, without having to face critics from right to left at all times.